A Prayer.............

God give me the strenght to bear the things i cant change,
and
Courage to change the things i can,
and
Wisdom to know the difference.

Yeah!!!!

This is how i have dreamed my that my proposal would be ;) he would go for a sure yes..but must look like enrique too;) ( kind of guesses to the lucky one!!!!)

Your Laughter

A poem by Pablo Neruda-


Take bread away from me, if you wish,
take air away, but
do not take from me your laughter.

Do not take away the rose,
the lance flower that you pluck,
the water that suddenly
bursts forth in joy,
the sudden wave
of silver born in you.

My struggle is harsh and I come back
with eyes tired
at times from having seen
the unchanging earth,
but when your laughter enters
it rises to the sky seeking me
and it opens for me all
the doors of life.

My love, in the darkest
hour your laughter
opens, and if suddenly
you see my blood staining
the stones of the street,
laugh, because your laughter
will be for my hands
like a fresh sword.

Next to the sea in the autumn,
your laughter must raise
its foamy cascade,
and in the spring, love,
I want your laughter like
the flower I was waiting for,
the blue flower, the rose
of my echoing country.

Laugh at the night,
at the day, at the moon,
laugh at the twisted
streets of the island,
laugh at this clumsy
boy who loves you,
but when I open
my eyes and close them,
when my steps go,
when my steps return,
deny me bread, air,
light, spring,
but never your laughter
for I would die.

I did....

I saw. I heard. I learnt. I fell. I rose. I admired. I respected. I grew. I gave. I took. I read. I wrote. I tore. I laughed. I made. I broke. I danced. I sang. I hymmed. I promised. I trusted. I forgot. I lied. I thought. I loved. I broke. I hugged. I smiled. I wept. I forgave. I cried. I won. I failed. I lost. I found. I screamed. I pleaded. I ignored. I thanked. I appologised. I dreamt. I slept. I woke. I felt. I whispered. I prayed. I searched. I touched. I pitied. I yearned. I knew. I impressed. I painted. I praised. I asked. I explored. I expressed. I judged. I justified. I went. I came . I lent. I borrowed. I hated. I wished. I wondered. I earned. I fought. I aimed. I goaled. I reached. I agreed. I listened. I expected. I ran. I meant...

I did...

and with every word, i lived....

Nostalgic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was so nice to be a kid...we didnt have to worry about anything except will my friend next to me return my eraser or not...or will i get more stars for my homework than him!!!!i still remember those days and asusual today i was goin throuh youtube and some of my loveliest childhood memories came back.......

It was this what i had found!!!!!!!!!






I still remeber how much i loved this when i was a kid...i must have been a little LKG goin kid waking up every sunday with this tune and song...It used to start as soon as i would wake up and i used to sit right close to the tv with my brush in my mouth....:D

This song still takes me to those days!!!!!!nostalgic!!!!!!

Anu malik....

Ya itne dinon se mera blog decay ho raha tha...but aaj waqt mila...ya lifes goin on good...leart a thing from it after bein kicked and kicked and kicked...That jitne bhi kicks khao kum hote hain...dint get it na leave it...kicks khate raho...

And tomm is independence day and i so hate not goin to coll on this day..This is one thing i love of school where we use to sing sare jahan se accha hindustan hamara in a byheart tune everyday and the pledge..i still remember not saying the line 'all indians are my brothers' arey sare indian bhai no way!!!!... though how many people hate anu malik i love him for


India o india kya kehna tera..
Iam so lucky ke tu hain mera..
Agar marjayenge janam phir se lenge..
india o tujme hin, tujhe na chodenge..

Yup i love bein an indian..there are so many things that we cant have any where else in the world..

like...

Khan woh pani puri on the roads...

I love the train journeys...every little station whose names sometimes are hard to pronounce..but still a part of the country..

I Love the id and diwali and holi here...

And though people hate the tv soaps and news channels..i love the way the hype is created..'Aur ek sansini...baccha phir se kue mein gir gayan'....

kahan sharukh, salman aur black mein kharidi hui tickets...aur dios like 'bhag dhanno bhag'

We can never have such streets, places and traffic any where...i know abt the traffic but i love it..

And the indial idol...yeh bhi to sirf yahin hain.....I love Emon hope he wins it!!!!

And endless such things which makes this place so close to heart...


Pata nahin that if i will be able to do anything for the country...par i think last but not the least even if i go anywhere A.R.Rehman will pull me back here...sach hian...

Mitte ki woh khusboo tu kaise bhulayenga...
tu chahe kahin jayen, tu laut ke ayega..

khoye khoye dil se mere koi to yeh kahega..

Yeh jo Des hain mera, swades hain mera....

Aur things are all the same at home..Yup theres a french connection at home now..my family so belives in borderless world!!!!!!!!!

Let me see how long i stay from my blog again and phir se exams turning up..have to buy the textbooks now...sigh!!!

And I cant lecture phado like the speeches on indep day like' WE ARE STILL DEVELOPNG WE HAVE TO WORK FOR THE NATION' but atleast i think i can watch range de basanti and say all to be PROUD!!


HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!!!!!!

P.S: Dont ask why anu malik...blog mein koi aur word hasne layak tha nahin...eekks!!!

Tere bin

I had desperately been wanting the lyrics of Tere Bin by Rabbi Shergill .After Bulla ki jana, this is another beautiful song by Rabbi, written by himself.
Rabbi You Rock!I jus love it...the most romantic song ever!!!!!!!!!!
:)
So here go the Lyrics with The Translation:



tere bin / besides you
sanu sohnia / my love
koi hor nahio labhna / i shan't find another
jo dave / who'll give
ruh nu sakun / peace to my soul
chukke jo nakhra mera / and indulge me
ve main sare ghumm ke vekhia / i have gone and seen it all
amrika , roos, malaysia / america, russia, malaysiana
kittey vi koi fark si / there wasn't any difference
har kise di koi shart si / they all had some condition
koi mangda mera si sama / some asked for my time
koi hunda surat te fida / some were fascinated with my face
koi mangda meri si vafa / some demanded my fidelity
na koi mangda merian bala / none wanted my demons
tere bin / besides you
hor na kise / no one else
mangni merian bala / wanted my demons
tere bin / besides you
hor na kise / no one else
karni dhup vich chhan / shall shade me in the sun
jiven rukia / (the) way you paused
si tun zara / slightly
nahion bhulna / i shan't forget
main sari umar / all my life
jiven akhia si akhan chura / you said, looking away
"rovenga sanu yad kar" / "you shall weep in my memory"
hasia si main hasa ajeeb / i laughed a strange laugh
(par) tu nahi si hasia / but you didn't
dil vich tera jo raaz si / you had a secret in your heart
mainu tu kyon ni dasia / why didn't you tell me
tere bin / besides you
sanu eh raz / none shall tell this
kise hor nahion dasna / secret to me
tere bin / besides you
peerh da ilaaj / what druid
kis vaid kolon labhna / has the cure to my ills
milia si ajj mainu / i found today
tera ik patra / a note of yours
likhia si jis 'te / on which you had scribbeled
tun shayr varey shah da / a varis shah couplet
park ke si osnu / upon reading which
hanjnu ik duliya / a teardrop fell
akhan 'ch band si / what was locked in the eye
seh raaz ajj khulia / was revealed today
ki tere bin / that other than you
eh mere hanjnu / these tears of mine
kise hor / won't be kissed by
nahio chumna / none else
ki tere bin / that other than you
eh mere hanjhu / these tears of mine
mitti vich rulnha / will wither in the dust

Dine at mine.....

How do i start...this is always a big prob,i dont get good bollywood ishtyle startings anyways as iam back it feels good and the days spent were the best yet,it was nice spending time with cousins and grandparents..and yeah i have learnt a lot of things firstly to make good tea as i didnt have my dadmade tea back there and as no one drinks tea there( can you wonder people not having their morning cup of tea!!!) and one afty i was next to my nani who was making chiken whatever in the kitchen, i thought i would jus help her;)for which she said yes and regretted later, but really its so easy to cook stuff in the kitchen she did noting jus put all the things one after the other and it all cooked up it self..i went nani this is easy than EMTL...as she was goin sigh!!!!!!yeah so if at all iam marooned in an island and if by Gods grace all the things apper neatly in front of me and if there is no other living being who can put them all together and cook i think i can cook:)what say..right from shahi paneer to kheer and i can end up with my own brand of restro!!!!!!!;)
The weather is all good from las two days as the monsoons are in and you can find me singing in neighbours wondering pitch at home and i dont know why this song is playing in my mind right from yesterday "Mere piya gaye rangoon wahan se kiya hain telephone tumhari yaad satati haih jiye ko bada rulati hain...." and the news at home is my sister who has taken science is pestering me the same old physics material which i felt like dumping in the well four years back...yesterday she had to prepare for her weekend exams and as she found me doin nothing told me to teach her the parellogram law...we went

Her: Hey kya yeh important hain, itna bada hain, if i right half of it how many marks will i get( as if i was the 11th board invi in my pichla janam)

Me: mujhe kya maloom....haan thats very important damm sure tommorow

Her: toh tell me na yeh kaise aya i cant understand the derivation(me goin sigh!!!why did i tell her)

ME: Taking the text and reading substitute equation 4 and 3 in one....and goin arey kuch nahin four aur three ko one mein substite kar......

Her: english mujhe bhi ati hain....

Me:taking back the text and trying to understand the substitution which i must have mugged up way back....

She: tu book wapas karde, i have exam tomm....

Me: finally!!!!!!!! sigh!!!!!!

Please if you guys know few bahanes or have read a book or if even you have seen such book some where on How to talo such situations pleaaase temme.......
signing off till then............see ya.... and hows the new name i have come up wid for my restro!!!!(see the title dhakan!!!!!!!!!)

Bangalore callin!!!!!

Hiya!!!Exams are ending..one more to go...they went kinda okok...and yeah iam laving for bangalore as soon as they end up...I jus love this place...the coolest place on earth...the crowd and climate simply superb....the las time i was there it was chrismas time..i tell you it was lovely...so all the fun again and i was waiting for this from so long...nothing more to blog actually...hope there will be lots to after coming back...or may be if get my hands on a keyboard in banglore..so hope to see you soon with lotzzzzz of spicy newzzzz.

and..

ZYADA MAT KHAO...

and...

GET UP ONLY ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF BED(nahin to bap re likne ke liye bhi darr lagraha hain)

and...

SHEEZ.... STOP DOIN WHAT YOU ARE DOIN RIGHT NOW.....GAWD DISGUISTING...(Thank me for i didnt write what u are upto;))

and

JIYO HASON MUSKURAO...KYA PATA KAL HO NA HO!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY MAY AND JUNE.........SEE YA.....(muaah muuah!!!!!)

Know about me....(Scroll on the icons!!)

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Once again we met....

Just something here out of my journal,this is how life in reality is and not the thing which we see in movies and dream all day about....jus temme if you guyz liked it.....



"Thinking of you every moment, with lots of love to my fiancee.."

I shuffled through the many cards at the Archies gallery,City center, to send a token of love for his bouquets of love daily,and what better than a card that says it all, and Archies surely knows what you want to speak.........

Would he like this one,naah the other one is better ,this ones good,he'll love it.I turned every card there to given to a fiancee and as i put them back restlessly at their place, i saw him.........

It took me a second to actually feel that he was standing right in front of me, looking for deos.Just hope he didn't see me.Gawd i cant face him again,not those eyes at least.Do i stand here and fumble at the cards or buy and leave as soon as possible...Naah, i think he's finished, he would be at the counter any moment.......

I carelessly took an other card,"To my fiancee..."as i looked at him. He looked as handsome as ever as he stood there waiting for the bill and slowly the past started reeling in front of my eyes as though yesterday,those college days,those nights which i spent thinking about him.......

Did he just look at me,ya he did.He's coming here, i better move away and as i pretended to read the cards i heard..

"Hey Priya,how are you,after a very long time"

"Ya ....huh....umm..How are you"

Why do i have that gazed look on my face now...

"God, you have changed a lot, you looked a lot different in college"

Why is that my heartbeat was going faster....Just if he didn't look into my eyes......

"Wow!!! good news then what does he do", he said as he looked at the cards in my hand.

"He's in US and what about you"

"Hey can we go in for a coffee, long time we met huh!!"

Why couldn't i say that i gotta go, why do i have to go dumb as always whenever i see him.He took my silence as yes as we moved to Barista on the third floor......The coffee shop was full as always but we found a cosy table in the corner for two.

"Coffee...Ya two cappachino please"

I looked at him again as he ordered.why didn't he ever understand my feelings, couldn't he see it in my eyes and why couldn't he understand my silence..

"So, what are you doing lately, US and all rich life then huh?"

I came back to my senses, was he just my imagination.........

"Ya we got engaged three months back,getting married in December."

"Great!!!all set then"

"What about you..."

"I have got a job in Mumbai, work keeps me moving from one city to other.."

I was about to ask if he got married as the coffee arrived...naah....do i care anymore, so i went..

"So didn't see much of you after college..those days were so much fun"

"Ya i miss them too.."

As he started ranting about our college days i started wondering, why couldn't i ever tell him, would we have been together now if i had done, did he ever have those feeling which i had for him.....and do i still feel for him.....huh..

"Priya, where are you, i just asked hows Netan.You know i always thought that you guys had something going on....gawd those days were blissful..."

And he went again talking all about his work and work and more work....why am i feeling guilty, am engaged, iam not supposed to think of him anymore....Could there still be any chance of us being together,does he feel for me in any way...Do i have the right to hope......Do i ask him now........

"There we go, coffee's finished and time to leave too...Nice meeting you Priya....naah i pay..."

I need to tell him atleast now, i looked at him as he removed his wallet to pay and suddenly my eyes met a pic in it....Gawd she was gorgeous...

"Girlfriend..huh?"

"Naah, my love..my wife..."

I gave a feverish smile more to myself than to him.This is life and we move on with it i said to myself as we moved out of Barista, we exchanged numbers and happy take cares as we took the opposite paths....

I smiled as i saw him go, and somewhere laughed at my self for thinking silly,was it to hide the pain for it did hurt somewhere.....I moved into Archies again and this time to send him a card heartfelt and not something randomly picked...

"My life has changed the day you step in, and for all those wonderful days and nights that we are going to spend together...With lots of love to my sweetheart, my fiancee..."

Life moves on....................

subeh hogayi mamu!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today:
5:00 am: Mobile beeps,and i wake up wondering where am i, had a weired dream of missing my tenth standard hall ticket exam and woke up searching for it....switched off the mobile and went back to sleep again.....was just hoping for some good dreams.......

5:30am: Sister wakes up asking,"exam nahin hian kya",and me waking up again with stupid expressions saying"Exam mera hain,whats with you",suddenly EMTL prof came into mind and after that nap was a distant dream....

5:45 am: Land line rings...tring tring and i wonder whose callin so early and run to pick up phone and go Grrrrrrrr!what the hell...it was for my little sis who i later came to know was goin for badminton classes in the morning with her friend.......she then hurries up fighting for the toothpaste and the bathroom....as i take an other nap..

6:00 am:EMTL notes is turned and turned and turned as i mug for the next three hours......

9:00 am:Have a quick shower and my breakfast,after all man is a social animal..........

10:30 am: At coll writing the exam while singing "Hey you, hey you I don't like your girlfriend",Crap why did i have to listen to this song for nearly 10 times yesterday....."Whats the Maxwell's equation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"........"hey you, hey you, you can get a better one"...............

12:30 am:Came out from the exam hall............. Sigh!!!!!!!!!What a hard work.......

1:00pm:By the way whats pm????????? at home jumped on the keyboard and saw the scraps and shifted to youtube........Its such a nice creation.......

2:00 pm: had my grub and again on comp typing this irrelevant nonsense...........
This is how life goessssssssssssssssss...........................

KUCH BHI RAKHLO......

Life is going on a much speeded track,as i realise that though how far we move away from committing on our relationships we need them...it just that we avoid them as we are afraid.....its just because we face such things in life that we don't want to be through that again....

Last night again i found my self with my friends,laughing complaining and finding faults with each other but still wanting to spend every minute together...i saw myself being the most happiest person for that particular moment....but how long was it going to stay.....one by one the days will pass,our memories will pass and when i will move away from them may be these days will flash in my mind,that laughter and that sarcasm.....

Why is that whenever we meet,we have this guilt that its not going to be the same always,its not going to be there forever,why is that yesterday we had to shake our hand and say that we will not hide anything from each other and why did we have to realise after a long time again that its not going to be same forever.....

Why did he have to say yesterday that "hum hamesha jinke saath rehna chahte hain,nahin reh sakte,isiliye khuda ne yaadein banayein" and why did my friend whom i missed from the past two years have to say,"can i get everything back".............

Silent screams....

Disclaimer: It is just a part of the writers imagination and bears no resemblance to her personal life and therefore no personal comments will be entertained.

Monday turns to Tuesday and then into Saturday but your visage that still looms over has left me in a state beyond numbness for i cant feel either the love or pain.The say time heals but the time spent in your memories is not healing but poisoning the wounds as the days tick by.....your smile,your feel your picture were in my every song and your words echoed in my dreams,yet you stood away from me.You made me hope,you made me dream,you made me think of you every breathing moment, you had become my reason to smile, yet there you stood knowing it all but still not deciphering the depths of my needs.

As the darkness engulfs over the night i think of you again but the series of hurt and pain soon follow,let me end it here and let me be free for i want to feel the lightness for a while, let the pleasantness drool over my aches and let me feel the freedom for now even my blood pleads for life, and let me gain the emancipation.I know that the step am taking is what people call cowardice,but let me take it as it gives me this immense sense of satisfaction, for at least you may miss me once with the soul of your heart.....

I see death,as i look down upon the tiny cars passing beneath, and how very strange, everything looks so small from here.....
I hear the low and meek sounds of the horns which are trying to make their way out.....
I feel the cool breeze gushing in through my hair,as if it has some secret to be told.....
I touch my hands as the prickness of death has left it numb.......
I look upon the starry sky as a shiver lets down my spine .........Is this death.....

Just a little push and and everything will end,the pain the aches,and the blissful feeling which have now become a burden so heavy and strong..........

I need just an internal push ,It could be damn very easy.........very easy if my soul stops searching for your memories again and if my inner voice stops fighting against myself....i could damn do it if your words stop echoing in my ears again right now........why am i hearing you again.........just a push.......

"Hey senorita,Love you always"

"Just one push and it will all end"

"I love you, I love you,I love you so much"

"You cant do this,for bloody hell this is your life,you cant stop it"

"Can i have the pleasure of a dance with you ma'am"

"Just a push"

"I promise I'll never leave you and will be with you in all your tough times"

"You cant end it like this he didn't deserve you,get on with your life,look for the dawn"

"I can do it,why am i not able to"

"Hey baby where's my kiss"

"You cant take your life,move back,search on for your happiness,your world is waiting for you"

"I cant think any more, just one step"

"I love you my senorita,and how about you"

"Move back"

"I think we will have to part from here,my parents don't approve of our relationship,hope you,understand.... and maybe whatever happened was just a bit of infatuation"

"Why am i feeling the pain again, just one step and it will all end"

"Move back, you cant, you wont"

Why am i feeling weak again, let me do it...........

The darkness soon engulfed my inside as i closed my eyes, all i can hear are the screeching horns again and i wonder whether the night is darker or my inside, was it because your voice triumphed over mine i did not know, for now i could not feel either the breeze, nor hear the horns nor could i hear your words nor did i have to speak to myself again.........

What was the secret that the wind whispered for i could not even feel the emancipation.

Cant think of one too...

Yup...back again but i wouldn't say wid a bang...have been through all kinds of ups and downs in the past few days...now dont stare and ask what happened iam tired of answering people "NOTHING WRONG WID ME"...i dont know if its this teens thing that happen to all but i think i have got a syndrome called"leave me alone"and a person severely suffering with this syndrome must not be pestered......i know the people iam tring to stay away are my friends but kabhi tho u feel like just being you....and not tring to smile because you have to...sometimes you feel like jus being on the bed all day long and no calls.... no people expecting things from you...it happens and iam presently suffering with this syndrome....iam kinda trying to settle down my mind so that i can atleast attempt the exams that are turning up like unexpected rains...
The biggest knowing thing that happened last week was my lab exam ELECTRICAL TECNOLOGY....my so called brain cells were having nice nap on Kurlon pillows for days and suddenly this record was in my lap to byheart the circuits i tell you it was hell....couldnt remember atleast one after seeing the other...suddenly felt like trying to solve the sudoku so the brain cell gets worked up.......wanted to put up some other posts but kinda no time now...will definietly next time....and hope i get to write better blogs then this...and my brain cells get activated..............

Every body needs them..........

Hey check out these lovely thoughts.....,got them form yahoo messages............

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who Iam when I am with you.

2. No man or woman is worth your tears,and the one who is, won't make you cry.

3. Just because someone doesn't love youthe way you want them to, doesn't meanthey don't love you with all they have.

4. A true friend is someone who reachesfor your hand and touches your heart.

5. The worst way to miss someone is to besitting right beside them knowing youcan't have them.

6. Never frown, even when you are sad,because you never know who is falling inlove with your smile.

7. To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.

8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman,who isn't willing to waste their time onyou.

9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one,so that when we finally meet the person,we will know him....

Does this need one...

The 'so called writer's' mind is totally out of order,so please bear with the in convenience...
Your patience if at all left is highly appreciated..

Abhi sason mein hain dum,tu chalne de sitam

Hiya!!Lovely being back after a long time, got messed up with the things going on in life, done things for which I think I should be put up in Azkaban for a while(No ,I didn’t try to run out with a guy or join any terrorist group…Dirty mind!!!!) just something unbloggable………..College life is sucking as usual,Gawd!!! there is nothing to blog………
Why is this little paper clip on my ms word starring at me, its scratching its so called head and looking at my blog, looks like it is wondering ‘My life is better than this writer’…its got a lighting bulb on it now….may be it has got some idea……..Its trying to wink and smile at me now…..tryin to flirt huh!!wait lemme send him back to his window…Oh!! i see his name is clippit and he says he is though nothing more than a metal wire he will help me find all my answers…Mr.clippit living you life is easy, try mine…….
God, you are still reading this crap…..you can expect some good stuff next time……..I tried to do some serious poetry…and YES I WROTE THAT!!! Iam sorry for all those who read that and got a minor heart attack thinking ‘Did she write a poem, a whole poem’ I got personal comments the next day people asking what got into you……..
And last but not the least Abhi is getting married( stop wondering like clippit…its Abhishek bachan)…God..can you just send someone as handsome and tall like him for other girls like me!!!!!!!!!!
And how was the title...this thing keeps me really goin,try it...when you feel suppresed by others or cant help yourself out of any situation just say it and see how it works...........